Challenge… Writing About Silence
It’s very interesting that I am writing about silence and yet I can’t find anything to say. My mind is blank. I am frustrated because this is my homework that I have taken upon myself, and yet all I really want to do is to lie down and take a nap.
It’s always a balancing act, trying to figure out how to manage the symptoms of MS that I deal with every single day..and on the other hand, keeping myself as healthy as I can, and paying attention to my body. On the one hand dealing with multiple sclerosis is a God damn bitch. And then on the other hand, I try to live my life in a spirit of optimism and joy. One of the symptoms that I deal with is pain, particularly in my shoulders and neck. It’s hard to ignore. It’s nagging and throbbing, and I can’t seem to get comfortable. And yet another symptom is debilitating fatigue which can overwhelm everything, particularly if I am not paying attention and give in to its harshness.
This project of writing about silence for seven days in a row came from one of the spiritual books that I have read entitled “The Seat Of Power– Finding Your Power Within” by Vishwanash Sri. The purpose is to forget about doing anything else of importance such as reading e-mails, answering phone calls, going to meetings until I take half an hour to write about something. The suggestion is to write about silence. And, by the end of the week I will have learned something very valuable about myself and my priorities.
Since I pay particular attention to the books that come into to my space I decided to give it a try and to embrace this little project, seriously knowing that something surprising and truly great can come from the smallest of deeds. It is now day four and it is getting easier and easier to do this and I come over to my computer with excitement rather than with 00 that I will again have a mental block, a writer’s block, which is happened so much lately. Of course, it is much easier to write when there is no distracting noise. And I am finding it much easier to write when I have it scheduled before I get tangled up in all of the other stuff that I need to do.
I am learning the discipline of keeping my word to myself. No one else knows that I am doing this and there was no one who could nag me about getting it done. And once you actually sit down at my desk with the first half an hour already planned, gotten something down on paper and ready to post on my blog, and then I have the rest of the day to accomplish whatever I want and need to do.
Of course, I will let you know how this little writing adventure turns out. I have no expectations, which is really the best way to live anyway. That way you will not be disappointed and will always be grateful for what you have. Already I am seeing a great result in that I have no longer in a writer’s block!
I always do my writing at the computer since I am paralyzed on my left side and have MS. By using the Dragon naturally speaking voice recognition program, which is a lifesaver for me. Without it I would not be able to write at all since I can no longer type and my handwriting has gotten totally illegible. To be able to reach out to people, to help others and to be a contributor in the world is so wonderful. There was a time when I was so terribly depressed and actually pondered suicide. Those days are gone but not forgotten. During that time of my life. I was dwelling on the negatives and could not see past my predicament of having MS and a husband who became verbally abusive and ultimately left me for someone else.
Along the way I have forgiven him and now have so much more time to dwell on the bright side of the street and concentrate on living in the light. Because of all that happened during that time, and there was so much, I actually wrote and published a book entitled Potty Mouth, which is a memoir of a woman who has had MS for 40 years and the lessons that I have learned along the way. I write with humor, with inspiration, with insight and in the spirit of helping other people to cope with difficulties.
If you are interested in learning more about how to get my book, if you want an inspiring story, if you have a love of reading or if you need information about disabilities check out the Potty Mouth website. Thank you so much and I wish you well! http://www.thepottymouthbook.com/